Bathroom

Reply to: I think success all depends on if you are all coming from similar backgrounds. Not to say people couldn't adapt, but it would be very hard. Years back my wonderful in-laws started spending winters away from England and with us in sunny Florida. It always started out pleasant and enjoyable. As time went on it became unbearable. My father in-law came from an upper crust unbending, strict background and my mother in-law a strict upper tier military family. My husband loved them very much but was a bit of the rebel child and my background couldn't have been more opposite. My early circumstances was that of one parent who was unavailable emotionally and one who was unavailable physically. I was really more of the parent to my younger siblings and started working at a young age. My husband and I bought our homes with no financial contributions but our own.We were both pretty much independant types although deep down my husband sought his parents approval. Very slowly, creeping along... my in-laws would flip the dynamics into the we are the parents and you are the children. They gave their unsolicited advise on every little thing. I tied ignoring it but when I did they would make comments to my husband. It got to the point (and a strain in our marital harmony) that at the start of yet another visit I had to sit them down and explain the house rules. To his mother I said: there is only one female boss in this house and that's me. To both of them I warned that unsolicited advice would not be tolerated. Things became a little better. I can't say they didn't have moments though. I do not regret the time we had with them but do wish I wouldn't have put up with so much for so long. My husband was little to no help so managing the strain was left completely up to me. Whatever you decide, don't gradually...slowly, give up who you are.

Q