The closer the stain to the color of the wood, the less you see it. The grain is open so stain is thicker in the open parts and shows up as such. A really dark stain might work also. I would get a scrap piece of oak and some small cans of stain and do samples until you find one you like.

Train wreck. Your cabinet maker should produce already finished cabinets, or you shouldn't be buying from him. Staining is only part of finishing. It ain't for amateurs. Or you should buy commercially produced cabinets. No amount of ''savings'' is worth ruining all of your cabinets.

I can't emphasize again on doing your homework and practicing on something first. Wood finishing is not like painting. I've been doing it for years and it is a lot of work to get right. here are some pics of stained oak cabinets that have gone badly.

this one is Gel stain

you must use a pre-stain conditioner. grain like that will have different absorption points. some will come out darker, lighter and blotchy. do not use minwax. i'm glad your MIL liked it. does your wood look just like that? its a very heavy grain. you will never hide that. embrace it and like it, or get something else.

Because you are a complete novice, there is way too much involved to give a complete how to on here. Ditto for comparing gel, stains and dyes. Go buy yourself a book, otherwise I'd be typing for days!

as I've said, do your homework and research the other site for 'correct' how to. if you just google "how to stain cabinets", you're at the mercy of any hack who does a youtube video.

lol. ok, well in your original post you sounded like, "i've never done this please help". Now they're almost finished?? what exactly is it u want help with? The grain? ain't gonna happen. The stain? You just said they were almost finished. you want to switch to something else?? I don't get it.

ah ok. gotcha. make sure he gives you plenty of scrap wood for you to practice and sample.

and yes, there is no way for me to give u instructions here. way too involved. you will have read a book to familiarize yourself w/basic wood finishing and read through the posts over at the forum site to further educate yourself. If you don't, I can promise you that you will be back here asking to 'how to fix these'. Perhaps you could pay a pro to finish them for you??? At the very least have someone spray on a top coat, factory finish, for you. Trust me.

A blanket statement like "do not use Minwax" is useless and pointless. It's a useless and pointless as saying "don't by anything except Minwax".

I have used Minwax products over the years and never had a problem.

tatts,,,,i have too. but they aren't the best. He's new and asked. If you go to where the pros hang out and talk about issues and techniques, every single one of them will say the same thing about Minwax. I've used enough products to know the difference. while Minwax is ok, it would not be the first, second or third choice when doing a big project like cabinets. He asked for a brand. I said "don't use Minwax". My opinion and he asked for one. Not useless and pointless. If he wants to know why, i'll explain.

I used a gel stain when refinishing my oak cabinets - as a stain on stripped wood, not over finished wood. I did find I was able to control the amount of stain that got in the grain better. It does take longer to dry. I've used a couple of different brands of gel stain and found the Miniwax hard to work with, though I have not had trouble with their regular stains.

RJ,,,i found these links over there that might give you a bit of insight. I didn't read the entire thing but they talk about gel stains on kitchen cabs, how to sand, etc.

http://www.woodworkingtalk.com/f8/kitchen-cabinet-stain-top-coat-varnish-finish-60748/

http://www.woodworkingtalk.com/f8/gel-stain-will-not-dry-need-advice-123753/

http://www.woodworkingtalk.com/f8/sanding-red-oak-37866/