Christmas: 10 Ways to Ensure a Harmonious Festive Family Visit
Having family to stay at Christmas can be stressful. Keep the following tips in mind to ensure a conflict-free gathering
Where are you supposed to have Grandma sleep when you don’t have a guest room? Who controls the thermostat? Who gets the first shower? And do you have to let your brother bring his dog? Having family to stay can be both easier (you know what to expect) and harder (fighting is more familiar) than having friends as house guests. Here’s how to handle these quandaries and more.
Be flexible about temperature
If you are used to keeping that thermostat set to a firm number, it’s time to loosen your grip. Older relatives may want the rooms to feel nice and cosy… which may seem hot to you, but remind yourself it’s only temporary. Of course, if you notice the thermostat set to a wildly inappropriate temp (like 35 degrees) it’s reasonable to adjust it — and assure your warmth-loving relation you will be sure to keep things nice and warm without going overboard.
If you are used to keeping that thermostat set to a firm number, it’s time to loosen your grip. Older relatives may want the rooms to feel nice and cosy… which may seem hot to you, but remind yourself it’s only temporary. Of course, if you notice the thermostat set to a wildly inappropriate temp (like 35 degrees) it’s reasonable to adjust it — and assure your warmth-loving relation you will be sure to keep things nice and warm without going overboard.
Don’t make your elders sleep on the sofa
If your little sister is coming to stay, it’s OK to ask her to take the sofa or sleep on an air mattress. But when it’s Mum or Grandpa we’re talking about, they deserve a bed. If your bed is the only bed in the house, that means you’ll be sleeping on the sofa.
Respect privacy
Need something from your bedroom, but Grandma is staying in there? For the time being, consider it her bedroom. Always knock and wait for a reply before entering. And if you need something while she is not in the room, it’s still polite to let her know you’ll be going in.
Discover how to make the guest room gorgeous
If your little sister is coming to stay, it’s OK to ask her to take the sofa or sleep on an air mattress. But when it’s Mum or Grandpa we’re talking about, they deserve a bed. If your bed is the only bed in the house, that means you’ll be sleeping on the sofa.
Respect privacy
Need something from your bedroom, but Grandma is staying in there? For the time being, consider it her bedroom. Always knock and wait for a reply before entering. And if you need something while she is not in the room, it’s still polite to let her know you’ll be going in.
Discover how to make the guest room gorgeous
Discuss shower schedules
Have a quick chat with your guests about their preferred shower times as they are getting settled in — this is especially important if you only have one shower or if the hot water is temperamental. If it sounds as if there will be a time crunch, offer to take your own shower in the evening.
Have a quick chat with your guests about their preferred shower times as they are getting settled in — this is especially important if you only have one shower or if the hot water is temperamental. If it sounds as if there will be a time crunch, offer to take your own shower in the evening.
Make it clear what’s theirs and what’s yours
Your family should respect your privacy when staying with you, but they may not. That’s just family. It’s a gracious touch to leave out extra toiletries for your guests to use, but you may also want to tuck out of sight anything you don’t want them to use (or see), like that super-expensive face cream you use only a drop of or your prescription meds.
Your family should respect your privacy when staying with you, but they may not. That’s just family. It’s a gracious touch to leave out extra toiletries for your guests to use, but you may also want to tuck out of sight anything you don’t want them to use (or see), like that super-expensive face cream you use only a drop of or your prescription meds.
Have a guest-friendly kitchen
When family has travelled from afar, their eating schedules can be thrown way off. Make it obvious where the snacks and breakfast-making supplies are by keeping everything out on the worktop, so your family can help themselves whenever hunger strikes.
When family has travelled from afar, their eating schedules can be thrown way off. Make it obvious where the snacks and breakfast-making supplies are by keeping everything out on the worktop, so your family can help themselves whenever hunger strikes.
Stock up on favourites
One good thing about having family to stay is that you are probably already familiar with their preferences. Know Dad needs his super-strength coffee first thing in the morning? Be sure to pick up a packet of the good stuff and set out all of the equipment where he can easily find it at 6am, and he won’t have to disturb you.
Learn more about keeping your home fully stocked
One good thing about having family to stay is that you are probably already familiar with their preferences. Know Dad needs his super-strength coffee first thing in the morning? Be sure to pick up a packet of the good stuff and set out all of the equipment where he can easily find it at 6am, and he won’t have to disturb you.
Learn more about keeping your home fully stocked
Help your family understand baby’s routines (but stay flexible)
If you have a wee one in the house, it can be mighty frustrating when your in-laws come booming in right at nap time. But they won’t know better unless you tell them — and that’s usually best done before something goes awry. Of course, it’s pretty much impossible to keep everything the same for baby with a houseful of people. Do some deep breathing and remind yourself this is not forever. Then do your best to roll with it.
If you have a wee one in the house, it can be mighty frustrating when your in-laws come booming in right at nap time. But they won’t know better unless you tell them — and that’s usually best done before something goes awry. Of course, it’s pretty much impossible to keep everything the same for baby with a houseful of people. Do some deep breathing and remind yourself this is not forever. Then do your best to roll with it.
Aim to have at least one meaningful event
What that is totally depends on you and your family. It could be anything: a group outing, a walk in the woods, a family photo shoot, a late-night poker game. When the visit is done, if there was just one thing that went really well, that’s all most people will remember in years to come.
TELL US…
Will your family be staying with you over Christmas? Share your tales and tips in the Comments below.
What that is totally depends on you and your family. It could be anything: a group outing, a walk in the woods, a family photo shoot, a late-night poker game. When the visit is done, if there was just one thing that went really well, that’s all most people will remember in years to come.
TELL US…
Will your family be staying with you over Christmas? Share your tales and tips in the Comments below.
Some issues can be minimised with smart planning. If you know that you and a certain in-law will be fighting by day three, don’t make it a weeklong event. When there are ongoing family conflicts, it’s better for everyone to keep things short and sweet.
Also know that you are not obligated to provide pet housing. If you’re allergic to dogs or simply don’t want your brother’s bull terrier eating your sofa cushions, tell him in advance to make other arrangements for the pooch. He may be upset initially, but it would be better than fighting over a dog during the entire visit.